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I was naughty this morning. I was out of my egg whites so my mother went to Jack In The Box for breakfast and she got me the scrambled eggs and pancakes (which I gave to my son) and the sausage, bacon and hashbrowns. I used to love hashbrowns and sausage. I ate mostly the scrambled eggs and a very little sausage because it now tasted too greasy to me and I didn’t like the small nibble of hashbrowns that I had either. I’m sure for others it would have tasted like it always had, but post-op all I could taste was the grease. So, that is not likely to be repeated.

I was good the rest of the day though. I even had a cup of my decaf hazelnut Folgers coffee. I used to love coffee, I lived for coffee. I drank three or four twelve cup pots of coffee a day. I even came to love the decaf coffee when I had to quit the fully loaded coffee. I was so looking forward to that cup of coffee after not having any for a little over eight weeks. I hadn’t had any since the day before I went on my pre-op clear liquid diet. So, I close my eyes so that I can truly savor the bliss that is my cup of decaf… and it too has changed and doesn’t taste as wonderful as it used to. It was actually rather heart breaking.

My family ordered pizza to be delivered. I should likely describe how it feels to be the only person not eating dinner with the rest of the family. It is as isolating as any time I was picked last for kickball. I’m different now, because I can’t eat all the same foods that the rest of the family can, and so I’m now separate. At least that’s how it feels. I haven’t had a meal with my family really since starting the pre-op clear liquid diet. I’d like to just be able to sit down and have a meal with my family and have them eat the same things that I’m eating.