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For four weeks there, I had a boyfriend. I am not going to go into detail because half of those details are not my tale to tell but suffice to say that I am single once again and I have created a new dating profile for the online dating websites. I maybe could have waited a bit longer to get my figurative feet back under me, but it wasn’t that long of a relationship.

Within twenty-four hours of the new profile going “live” I received over thirty messages from different guys.

I am not bragging, I am fairly comfortable being average looking. Indeed I like the idea that I am average looking. I am an average twenty pounds overweight American woman. I had surgery in order to be “average”.

But I found myself doing something that I need to put an end to immediately. In my dating profile I posted the photo of me with my largest pair of jeans from when I was my most overweight, and a lot of these guys within five messages back and forth are saying “congrats on the weight loss, you worked hard.” What I need to put an end to is I keep replying with “oh well I had surgery.”

I need to stop dismissing what I’ve gone through, what I go through daily because of this path I’ve put myself on. The way I phrase it, makes it sound like somehow I am less deserving of a “congrats” than if I had gone through the weight loss the “old fashioned way.” I may not have done it the “hard way” but I willingly gave myself lifelong vitamin deficiencies in order to reach a healthier weight and I really need to not belittle that.

On a side note, I kind of miss being overlooked because attention is exhausting.

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